Emotional intelligence is a complex and multifaceted trait that is difficult to pinpoint in an objective way. Generally, it refers to one’s ability to recognize and understand emotions in themselves and others, and manage them in order to make healthy relationships and good decisions.
There are several ways to check the level of your emotional intelligence, including taking an ability-based test or using a self-report assessment.
Take an Emotional Intelligence Assessment
Emotional intelligence, or EQ, refers to your ability to identify and understand your emotions as well as those of others. This skill is a powerful tool in the workplace, as it helps you build strong relationships and collaborate with your colleagues. It also allows you to handle stress, manage conflict and resolve issues more efficiently.
If you want to know whether your EQ is high, there are numerous online resources that can help you evaluate it. One of these is Brainfall’s Moral Alignment Test. Most of these tests are free to take, but there are some that require you to provide personal details.
Nevertheless, it is important to remember that your results should not be over-interpreted. After all, a self-assessment is just one part of the picture, and it’s impossible to capture all of your characteristics in a single test.
Another option is the Genos Emotional Intelligence Inventory (Genos E.I), which is said to be one of the most scientifically validated assessments in the world. It’s also available in multiple languages and can be used by individuals or within teams.
There’s also the Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test (MSCEIT), which is an ability-based assessment that measures four branches of Mayer and Salovey emotional intelligence model.
This evaluation involves having people who know you offer ratings of your ability to perceive, identify, understand and manage emotions.
However, it’s worth noting that other-reporting can introduce bias into the assessment process, and the observers would need to have high EI themselves to be reliable.
Identify Your Triggers
The key to improving emotional intelligence is identifying what triggers you and how you respond.
Triggers are situations that create an instantaneous feeling of anger, fear or sadness. They can be simple events like hearing a loud noise or seeing something on the news, or they could be complex experiences like traumatic memories.
Identifying your triggers isn’t easy, but you can take steps to learn to recognize when you are upset.
The first clue that you’re triggered is a negative assumption about the situation, for example, if your boss critiques you and it feels personal or if your partner doesn’t respond to texts you assume they’re upset with you, this is a sign of being triggered. The root cause of your triggers is usually unresolved issues that stem from childhood or past trauma.
To help identify your triggers, write down a list of things that make you upset or angry. Then, try to find the underlying issue.
If you’re unable to figure out the root cause of your triggers, talk with a mental health professional who can help you work through traumas and improve emotional regulation.
They can also recommend therapy techniques that can address the underlying cause of your triggers such as exposure and EMDR therapy. They can also suggest other coping strategies to help you manage your emotions and avoid acting out in response to them.
Develop Self-Awareness of Your Thoughts and Feelings
People with high emotional intelligence can recognize when they’re in a negative state and understand the impact it has on other people. They’re also good at thinking about how others might feel in certain situations, which helps them be more empathetic.
Self-awareness is a core competency of emotional intelligence, and it can help you improve your performance at work and in your personal life.
Being able to identify your feelings allows you to be mindful of them and determine whether or not they’re beneficial to your goals. For example, if you’re feeling angry with your coworker, it might be best to pause before reacting and discuss the issue rationally.
Developing self-awareness can be difficult, but there are many tools available online that can help you do so. One of the most popular is TalentSmart, which offers a number of assessments that measure your ability to use EI. The assessments are free, but the company charges a fee for its coaching services.
Another way to increase your self-awareness is to ask for feedback from other people. Asking for a general opinion is fine, but asking specific questions about how you interact with them can help you pinpoint any areas that might need improvement.
Practice Active Listening Skills
Emotional intelligence skills are particularly important for building strong relationships in the workplace. They involve a positive way of managing emotions to relieve stress, empathizing with others, and communicating effectively.
One component of this is active listening, which involves attentively hearing the other person’s thoughts and feelings in order to better understand their perspective.
While this skill is important in all types of personal and professional relationships, it’s especially critical in the workplace because it can help you build stronger working relationships with coworkers and clients, as well as better address conflicts or concerns. It’s also a key part of making good conversation.
The best way to improve your active listening skills is by practicing them in different situations with a variety of people.
To begin with, you should strive to avoid asking “yes or no” questions that yield dead-end answers, such as “How did you feel about the meeting?” or “What do you think of the proposal?” Instead, ask open-ended questions that allow for more detailed responses.
Make sure to make eye contact when you’re listening and refrain from fidgeting, looking at your watch or cellphone, or other non-verbal behaviors that indicate you’re distracted.
During the conversation, you should also try to paraphrase or reflect back what you heard. This shows the other person that you understand them and can reduce the likelihood of miscommunication.
Improve Your Ability to Manage Conflict
Emotional intelligence includes the ability to manage your own emotions as well as the feelings of those around you. It also requires a high level of empathy, which is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and understand their point of view.
It can be difficult to develop your ability to empathize with others, but there are some simple ways to do it. The next time you get into a conflict with someone, try to see it from their perspective before reacting.
It may take some practice, but this will help you stay calm and avoid making accusations and defensive statements.
Similarly, if you are in a disagreement with coworkers, ask yourself what it is really about. A lot of times, conflicts appear to be about interests, such as money, power or land, when they are actually rooted in deeper needs like identity, security and respect.
Once you can figure out the real issue, it will be easier to collaborate with them to find a solution that is beneficial for all parties.
Focus on developing healthy boundaries, which means separating your work life from your personal life and understanding how to set appropriate limits. It can be hard to do, especially if you are prone to arguing over silly things, but it will make your work much more enjoyable.
Final Thoughts
Emotional intelligence is an important trait that can impact many areas of life, including relationships, career success, and overall well being. There are several ways to check the level of your emotional intelligence.
Self-assessment tools, such as online quizzes or questionnaires, can be a helpful starting point for evaluating your emotional intelligence. These tools can provide insight into your ability to recognize and manage emotions, communicate effectively, and build strong relationships with others.
Working with a coach or therapist can also be beneficial in developing and assessing emotional intelligence. A coach or therapist can help you identify areas of strength and weakness, and provide guidance on strategies for improving emotional intelligence.
Observing your own behavior and reactions in different situations can also be a useful way to assess emotional intelligence. Paying attention to how you respond to stress, conflict, and challenges can provide insight into your ability to manage emotions and communicate effectively.
Checking the level of your emotional intelligence is an important step in developing this valuable trait. Self-assessment tools, working with a coach or therapist, and observing your own behavior can all be helpful in assessing and improving emotional intelligence.
With effort and practice, anyone can develop stronger emotional intelligence skills, leading to greater success and wellbeing in all areas of life.
