In the modern world, the art of being a true gentleman is unfortunately one that is on the decline. With more men than ever holding people like Andrew Tate up as role models, the genuine modern gentleman is one that is no longer seen as a masculine role model.
But is this really true? Is the adage that ‘women love a bad boy’ actually true? Or is the lost art of gentlemanly behavior one that is going to die out and be lost forever?
The art of how to be gentleman is one that can be mastered by any man. And the truth is that to be a real gentleman is simply having respect for people, including (especially) women, and knowing how image reflects on people.
We’re going to dig into the world of the modern gentleman, and explain how you can be a real man using the lost art of the society of gentlemen.
What is a gentleman?
A gentleman is someone who possesses good manners and shows respect towards others. He is courteous and considerate, treating people with kindness and politeness. A classical gentleman would also be known for his integrity and honesty, always striving to do the right thing even when it is not the easiest path to take.
To put it simply: A gentleman is a good man who values respect for others and has a solid moral compass, in addition to following proper etiquette and social manners.
In addition to his own behaviour, a gentleman also values and practices self-improvement. He strives to constantly learn and grow, seeking knowledge, developing skills, and cultivating personal growth. A gentleman also takes pride in his appearance and maintains good hygiene, displaying a sense of self-respect and attention to detail.
A gentleman respects not only others but also respects himself. He understands the importance of setting boundaries and treating himself with kindness and compassion.
Furthermore, a gentleman is known for his generosity and willingness to help others. He understands the value of giving back to the community and contributing to the welfare of others. A gentleman also demonstrates empathy and compassion, showing genuine concern for the well-being of those around him.
Overall, being a gentleman is not just about outward appearances or societal expectations. It is about embodying qualities of kindness, respect, integrity, self-improvement, and generosity. A true gentleman is someone who strives to make a positive impact on the people around him and the world at large.
The Traits of a Gentleman
If you want to master becoming a gentleman, these following traits can help you understand how to be that man.
People will always judge a book by its cover, so make a good first impression. Invest in your wardrobe and dress well. Maintain a decent demeanour and avoid unnecessary fashion trends. Go deeper into your pocket if necessary. Remember that one Rolex watch says more than a hundred Casio watches.
Practice your grooming, watch YouTube videos on how to groom yourself properly, and conduct yourself with the highest regard. Know basic men’s hygiene. Learn how to trim your beard, and how to shave. Simple decency, such as sitting postures, should also be practiced. They’re simple things, but getting them wrong can have a detrimental long-term effect on your reputation.
Be confident but never arrogant
Maintain a confident disposition from the start, but avoid being arrogant. It’s a fine line to tread, but it’s not entirely impossible to maintain. Your choice of clothes has a big impact on your confidence, so it’s important to dress well no matter the occasion. You never know who you’ll run into.
Accept correction and acknowledge when you’re wrong. It’s better and more respectable to accept and learn from your mistakes than to make excuses for them. When greeting others, use a firm handshake that is neither too strong nor too flimsy.
Time is a very valuable resource that should be managed carefully. If you don’t respect your own time, at least respect that of others. Make sure to keep a sense of deadlines and time when making plans. Your ability to keep track of time can help make you a good impression. It also proves that you are a man of your word and that you respect others.
Master the art of conversation
Don’t be a boring and predictable man. Learn to initiate and sustain conversations. Don’t use the introvert card as an excuse; no one comes from the womb talking. It’s a skill, just like any other, and you can choose to excel at it.
Learn to converse with anyone about anything without invading or disrespecting their personal space. Complimenting others, even if you don’t believe they deserve it, makes people feel more at ease around you. Be attentive during conversations and congratulate others on their accomplishments.
Project your voice whenever you speak so that people don’t have to strain to hear you. Speak your mind and maintain eye contact. When you’re not making small talk, get right to the point and avoid beating around the bush. People appreciate it when you don’t waste their time.
Take care of your health
As previously stated, people will always judge a book by its cover. Maintain your health by eating well and exercising on a regular basis. You don’t have to be the most ripped man in the room, but staying fit will help you make a good first impression.
Responsibility is the ultimate sign of a gentleman. You should learn to keep your life together and not be all over the place. Being responsible also entails not taking advantage of others or hurting their feelings. Instead of making excuses, own up to your mistakes and make them right, it’s more respectable.
Humility does not necessarily imply that you cannot have swag; rather, it implies that you should treat everyone with the utmost respect, from the lowest in the room right to the CEO. Even a smidgeon of arrogance can tarnish a reputation that has taken years to build. Do good to others for the sake of doing good to yourself, and be grateful for the smallest of things. It goes a long way.
Use respectable language
Forget the stereotype that women prefer bad boys; while there may be some truth in this, it does not imply being a jerk. Using foul language, contrary to what you might think, does not make you look cooler; rather, it lowers your value.
The little things matter
As cliche as it may sound, the smallest details reveal a lot about a man’s personality. Going the extra mile when interacting with ladies is not corny.
Have good table manners. Before you begin eating, make sure everyone has a plate. Pull a chair for your date before you sit, and open the car door for her before you get in. Pay, or at least offer to pay whenever you go out with a lady. All of these are small gestures that reveal a lot about your personality.
Timeless manners, a good dress code and being well groomed will all go a long way to ensuring you are a genuine gentleman.
Every gentleman knows that being respectful, especially of women and people who work for you or with you, is the key to being respected.
Listen to people, hold the door open for men and women alike, smile often and be aware that your opinions are not definitive.
These are all things you can do to improve your reputation as a gentleman. Don’t seek attention. It is not always necessary to stand out from the crowd. It is your duty as a gentleman wherever you go to make a bold statement, leave, and be remembered long after you have left.