So you want to be the macho man, the James Bond that all women desire? Well, you’ve come to the right place. First and foremost, congratulations on deciding to stop being a wimp. Whatever your motivations are, the desire to be a better man should be at the top of your list.
Gentlemen are a dying breed because most people barely put in the effort to be it. Being a gentleman doesn’t cost anything, well, maybe an upgrade in your wardrobe, but nothing major.
Here are some steps you can take to be the perfect gentleman that’s remembered long after he has left.
- Knowledge is power
You don’t want to start a conversation blabbering about something you don’t entirely comprehend. It doesn’t hurt to avoid the mundane stuff and wait for a discussion in which you are well-versed and confident. Only express educated and factual opinions that you are certain of. This distinguishes you from the crowd.
- Be presentable
People will always judge a book by its cover, so make a good first impression. Invest in your wardrobe and dress well. Maintain a decent demeanour and avoid unnecessary fashion trends. Go deeper into your pocket if necessary. Remember that one Rolex watch says more than a hundred Casio watches.
Practice your grooming, watch YouTube videos on how to groom yourself properly, and conduct yourself with the highest regard. Know basic men’s hygiene. Learn how to trim your beard, and how to shave. Simple decency, such as sitting postures, should also be practiced. They’re simple things, but getting them wrong can have a detrimental long-term effect on your reputation.
- Be confident but never arrogant
Maintain a confident disposition from the start, but avoid being arrogant. It’s a fine line to tread, but it’s not entirely impossible to maintain. Your choice of clothes has a big impact on your confidence, so it’s important to dress well no matter the occasion. You never know who you’ll run into.
Accept correction and acknowledge when you’re wrong. It’s better and more respectable to accept and learn from your mistakes than to make excuses for them. When greeting others, use a firm handshake that is neither too strong nor too flimsy.
- Be punctual
Time is a very valuable resource that should be managed carefully. If you don’t respect your own time, at least respect that of others. Make sure to keep a sense of deadlines and time when making plans. Your ability to keep track of time can help make you a good impression. It also proves that you are a man of your word and that you respect others.
- Master the art of conversations
Don’t be a boring and predictable man. Learn to initiate and sustain conversations. Don’t use the introvert card as an excuse; no one comes from the womb talking. It’s a skill, just like any other, and you can choose to excel at it.
Learn to converse with anyone about anything without invading or disrespecting their personal space. Complimenting others, even if you don’t believe they deserve it, makes people feel more at ease around you. Be attentive during conversations and congratulate others on their accomplishments.
Project your voice whenever you speak so that people don’t have to strain to hear you. Speak your mind and maintain eye contact. When you’re not making small talk, get right to the point and avoid beating around the bush. People appreciate it when you don’t waste their time.
Read our guide to being a master of conversation here.
- Take care of your health
As previously stated, people will always judge a book by its cover. Maintain your health by eating well and exercising on a regular basis. You don’t have to be the most ripped man in the room, but staying fit will help you make a good first impression.
- Do not offer unsolicited advice
When having a conversation, it is advisable to listen rather than speak. Be cognizant of other people’s feelings and avoid saying anything that might offend them. Do not sell your opinions or advice to others unless they specifically request it. Remember that not everyone shares your values and principles, and some of what you say may come across as impolite to others.
- Be responsible
Responsibility is the ultimate sign of a gentleman. You should learn to keep your life together and not be all over the place. Being responsible also entails not taking advantage of others or hurting their feelings. Instead of making excuses, own up to your mistakes and make them right, it’s more respectable.
- Be humble
Humility does not necessarily imply that you cannot have swag; rather, it implies that you should treat everyone with the utmost respect, from the lowest in the room right to the CEO. Even a smidgeon of arrogance can tarnish a reputation that has taken years to build. Do good to others for the sake of doing good to yourself, and be grateful for the smallest of things. It goes a long way.
- Use respectable language
Forget the stereotype that women prefer bad boys; while there may be some truth in this, it does not imply being a jerk. Using foul language, contrary to what you might think, does not make you look cooler; rather, it lowers your value.
- The little things matter
As cliche as it may sound, the smallest details reveal a lot about a man’s personality. Going the extra mile when interacting with ladies is not corny.
Have good table manners. Before you begin eating, make sure everyone has a plate. Pull a chair for your date before you sit, and open the car door for her before you get in. Pay, or at least offer to pay whenever you go out with a lady. All of these are small gestures that reveal a lot about your personality.
These are all things you can do to improve your reputation as a gentleman. Don’t seek attention. It is not always necessary to stand out from the crowd. It is your duty as a gentleman wherever you go to make a bold statement, leave, and be remembered long after you have left.