A long-distance relationship is never easy, with those intense feelings amplified by that distance. As the saying goes, absence makes the heart grow fonder, but it can also be very frustrating and emotionally challenging. Like owning a car but you only have a picture of it, a long distance relationship can be hard..
For most, long-distance relationships come about by unavoidable circumstances. Transition to new work offices, family, or school is some of the reasons why many find themselves in long-distance relationships.
But with some adjustments to the way you do things, and some management of expectation, you can make your long distance relationship work.
Relationship challenges include setting aside time for one another, balancing the social life without your partner, and, most importantly, defining boundaries. Will yours be a happy ending? What should you do differently? Here are some tips to making your long-distance relationship work:
- Avoid over communication
Communication is key when it comes to every relationship. This, however, doesn’t translate to keeping tabs almost half a day. Talking for close to 12 hours a day will only mean you are sticky and possessive. It will be draining and exhausting for both of you. It’s not about endless calls and spamming your partner’s inbox; but instead, it’s the teasing at the right moments and the right spots.
- Lay down ground rules
Though it’s not perceived as sexy by most, it’s equally important to set realistic expectations you can both meet. This includes the aspect of communication and visiting one another. Conflicting work and school schedules, different time zones may affect the communication pattern. What time do you need attention? Who should be initiating the conversation? The point is, you should feel satisfied with the arrangement. Failure to which frustrations will build up, and either of you will feel inconvenient.
- Go old school
Long-distance relationships are more than just texts and video calls that help maintain the real-time contact between you and your partner. Technological advancements have come in handy, but lest you forget the feeling a physical thing invokes when it reminds you of your loved one. Having a shirt from them or cuddling up in a teddy bear will serve as a constant reminder of them. It can also help to regularly send postcards, surprise gifts, and delivery packages.
- Respecting and understanding the current situation
Mostly, long-distance relationships are not voluntary and are affected mostly by work or studies. However, if it’s voluntary, you should respect the reason whatsoever by choice of your partner. Guilt tipping your partner as the reason why the two of you are apart will not help but will only escalate unnecessary fights and arguments. You shouldn’t pressure your partner into moving into the city with you as the decision lies on them. Instead, you should strive to make your partner feel comfortable with you and make the most of your relationship. The long-distance is not the final stage of your relationship, and this can be changed with a maintained connection with your partner.
Relationships generally have challenges including communication and conflict resolution means, in long-distance relationships, the challenges become amplified making the whole thing harder than expected. It takes commitment to one another for any chance of it working. It’s worth trying every means possible to save your relationship as you will get to learn more about yourself and much about commitment. You will not know much about your partner including their tricks, what they like and dislike. The intimacy may not be passionate but it’s the intimacy that will keep the relationship going. So hang in there.